Blow the Wistle Ref! I need a time out!

Well it's another day and I feel like yesterday never ended. My Children are in turmoil and it's starting to get to me. I try with them. To reason our situation out, explain why things are the way they are. But they're so angry with me. So upset that I have put them in this situation and it's all my fault.

I am hearting so bad over everything myself and to hear my children say that they hate me for ruining their life. It's horrible.

and lake, oh yest Lake. To have him not returning my calls or getting information to me that I need. Not talking to his children for a month and then not sending money to help and the stress oh the stress!!!!

I receive bills for him, some of them coming out of our taxes and here I am trying to stay afloat and now I'm paying his court fees???!!!

lord, deli ever me! Send me where you will and pull me threw the thickness of mud that I find myself wading through and being pulled under by. Take my hands and pull me through to the safety of firm land!

True Love

As you all know, I have been going through a hard, stressful, and amazing time. And since you all know the details I figured I would go away from telling of the trials that I have been through and concentrate on the miracles.

Lake is talking, really talking. he is defying science to prove to the world that God is all powerful and mighty. So much more than man!

Rufus is in Heaven, for we all know "all dogs go to heaven" :) My children handled it very well also.

All my children are healthy and strong and beautiful inside out.

Since my travels began God has romanced me several times to let me know how much he loves me. He gave me a flock of birds every time I drove. Let them fly in the most beautiful patterns to remind me that he plays a part in everything.

He gave me fog, beautiful fog rising over a mountain of trees.

He road beside me from Roseburg and pointed out everything he made that I usually glance past and never really take in. Rolling hills, animals grazing, beautiful trees.

i find that every day God gives me a gift. A little token of his love in creating the world around me so that I would know I was special and loved by him.

I am not only blessed by my family and children, or by my friends and even I have found "aquaintances" whom have reached out to me through all this. But I am blessed by his pure, true love. A love that he gives to all, yet somehow he is so amazing that he can make me feel like I am the only one. his perfection, his true love.

The Kite Runner!

While this is not a true story, it sure gives the feel of one. I loved it!

Prepare yourself to watch this movie. You will not want to stop and it is very long. However there will be moments you will shudder with empathy for our poor boys and their strife, so be ready to be shocked at times.

So gripping that I couldn't leave the room at all. I watched intently, covering my mouth with a gasp at parts. My heart wrenching so badly at moments that I had to literally grab my chest. And at the end...a tear. One single tear that held in it a thousand tears from a thousand children. Yes I could have balled all night for Hassan.

I would read the book, but I do not think I could take the story again so soon. Perhaps in the future.

Lukers is 3!!!!!

Yes! my baby is 3! I can't believe it!

The kids had a blast decorating for the parties.

Luke was so excited about his Mickey Mouse Cake. He loves Mickey Mouse!

What a cutie Boy!

Poor Mickey....he ran into some problems.

Luke didn't quite get the smashing cake in the mouth thing. So he smashed it with his forehead????

Money! what a great gift $$$


He has the best expressions when he opens gifts!


Uncle Lee and him went fishing in the living room!

Yes my monkey man....he's three alright! :)

Morgan's A Nerd!

This was such a fun party! I love when we do themes! Everyone just gets into them so good!

Morgy and Unglee

ya, that's TP on your foot! LOL

Brookers!Tay Tay!
Abigool!

The Whole Gang!

What good is a party without wrestling ungly for the remote?

Luke thinks that buckshot and rufus should get to eat cake too!



What a blast!

Morgan Got her Dream Cake!


and the boots she was wanting!

Dance Party Time! Logan and Grandma won the team competition.


Morgan's friend bob..who lives on her belly.

What a pair! They both took first and second in the singing and dance singles competition

Diet Journal

well today went great! I took in 1313 in calories which included the following items....
1/2 pepsi
cream cheese frosting (which I accidentally licked off my fingers after making the kids a toaster strudel)
lean cuisine lasagna
1/2 apple
3 slices pizza
1 1/2 cup milk and 3 pieces of chocolate.

Very well done Myndee! Then came night time. the kids to bed and I sneaked another handful of chocolate. Then was "force fed" a piece of danish. its okay I thought. I'll make up for it some how and I'm still under 1650 calories. Then Luke woke me in the middle of the night and would not go back to sleep so then came the milk and toaster strudels for mom. Along with another handful of the "bad" chocolate! Ahhhh

My total today 2557!!!!

BAD MYNDEE!

So I start over now! Not tomorrow and binge more, not next week and say oh well. it starts here it starts NOW.

Diet Journal

Janauary 4, 2009

Well, I didn't get to work out. Rather I didn't make the time to work out. But my diet today was good!

1 cup applesauce (homemade of course) 100 cal.
special k snack bar 90 cal.
8 oz turkey 238 cal. (wow, can you belive how many cal. are in that)
tea with sugar 100 cal.
mini donut 60 cal. (oops!, it was lukes leftover)
2 pb & J sandwiches 940 cal. (This is where I failed!)
8 oz pork 400 cal.
1 cup diced potatos 150 cal.
16 oz 2% milk 240 cal.

Total 2237 calories!

I know I'm trying to stay below 2000, but I'm proud that I only went over this much, as I usually eat so much more. More than I thought I was!



January 5, 2009

Again...did not make time for a workout! Why can't I do that? I also was bad when luke woke me in the middle of the night and I broke into the candy stash! Ahhhhh. I bought the little reeses so that I could have some chocolate when I NEEDED it. One of them is 51 calories, and a good way to not over induldge. That is as long as I don't wake up in the middle of the night and eat 7!!!!!

While I didn't have the healthiest day, at least my calories where better.

2 four inch pancakes 128 cal.
3 tbsp jam 201 cal.
french fries 250 cal.
8 oz soday 140 cal
burrito light sour cream 360 cal
1 large banana 110 cal.
7 reeses mini cups 770 cal.
2 choc carmels 120 cal.

Total 2079 Calories!!!

I'm getting better!

Back to School?

Well, My payment to Lane has made it and I have my transcript. Now is the process of decision making. Do I start trying to go back to school, which includes filing a petition to get financial aid again, then getting aid, then hopefully surviving off of that while I live. Or, do I keep looking for work. They still haven't haired for the middle school yet so there is a possibility, unfortunately I didn't get the U of O position.

Then I question do I go to Lane or Umpqua. I have a best friend going to umpqua so I could carpool if the schedules matched. Or do I go to Lane, where I know where everything is. Guess i need to pray and research.

Cooper Christmas Fun!

The Cooper Christmas was so much fun! I could show so many photos, but narrowed it down to a few so you could get a general idea of our fun!

Gpa and Ma with all seven and their other halves.

You would think taking a pic of the grandkids...as adults would be easy. But of course it's not. they were picking on me!

The great grandkids!

Luke had to have his ornament on top!

Even the adults decorated them.

the best gifts are always homemade!

Luke squealed when he opened his computer.


Grandpa can't open his pocket knife without Luke's help....especially because Luke knew what was in it and wanted to play with it...LOL

Yes we grow em' big!

So the measuring contest began, with Lee winning.

But Morgan had to try too, just in case...she is growing fast ya know.

Uncle Dave had to see what the boys were looking at over that edge...none of us quite figured it out.

and of course..pinnocle...pinnocle and a little more pinnocle!



The kids played other games.

Aunt Darlene spoiled me rotten doesn't this look reat behind my sofa. And it works great for storing all my things and for my kids to go stuff:)


She also got me this spoon holder which I so needed and made me pillow cases and a shirt with my picture of the kids on it...on the slide in the park. and framed the picture as well.

What A Great Christmas!

Christmas Greatest Hits!

Christmas for us was so blessed my friends really came through this year. thank God for all of the people who love my children so much as to give them the biggest and best christmas they have ever had. The thought of them brings tears to my eyes even now.

Morgan got a gift certificate with this gift which was such a blessing as we are now having to shop for all those big girl items. She got everything she wanted for Christmas...except the cell phone.....lol...santa knew better!
Brookey loves this bear, while all her hannah montana and high school musical stuff is awesome and she adorns herself with it contantly, not a day goes by that I don't hear this bear singing "i will"

yes, it does look like grandma got a sexy calendar doesn't it. :) But no, it's one of those blankets that sip up to make a robe or something.

Logan's favorite...the fishing pole, but like Ryan is having some trouble getting out to go fishing.

Luke loves his measuring tape. He measures everything! #2 gift for him though, as the spiderman motorcycle won out over it.

My best gift. Handmade of course, by him. I hope to get the pics of him making it soon!

Luke got his first piece of candy out of the stocking and christmas was over as far as he was concerned! LOL! But Uncle Lee helped him find the rest.